When they met in the late 80's she was recently divorced working as a school bus driver with 2 young kids. I thought she was crazy when she married him but they're still together and she seems happy, and he helped her raise her kids to be successful, one's an Dr and the other is a clothes designer Sometimes things play out in the strangest ways. LuvOrlando , Feb 1, Jul 1, Messages: My exDH's first GF used to call me quite frequently.
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The stories he told her just didn't quite add up for her. She would tell them to me and have me scratching my head and thinking WTH!!!! He was quite a story twister!!!! It got to the point that she would keep me on the phone for LONG periods of time, and it was getting old for me. Thank God they broke up and the phone calls ended.
Jan 25, Messages: Never been divorced or married to someone divorced, but I know people divorced more than once. I think some men pick the same type of women, women they just don't get along with. And nope, I would never want to talk to the ex wife.
No point, since she wouldn't be me. DMRick , Feb 1, Well, this particular man is not controlling, he is just a big baby. He wants what he wants when he wants it. SO, if he gets paid, he will go buy what he wants before paying his bills and then cry to someone about not having money for the bills. When love is new, the gf gives in and gives him the money and he is all lovey dovey and just the best boyfriend you could ever have. Maybe this will work out if a woman has infinite money and patience, but he isn't getting any younger or more attractive, and has been "trading down" each time LOL. Jan 20, Messages: I was engaged to a guy who was divorced twice and lived with him for two years.
I often wondered what his exes would have to say but having been someone who an ex did call the things she was saying seemed very petty and more like she was just trying to have him be alone for the rest of his life not an ex of the guy I was engaged to, a previous boyfriend or vent to someone. Anyways, I broke things off with the guy I was engaged to and living with not over anything I think I could've been warned about just differences in life direction and differences in personality but we got along great.
That was 5 years ago and I recently found out he's been married 2 times since and is now divorced again at I almost feel sorry for him. I think most people have to learn things on their own and everyone is different in every relationship.
I've never had the same relationship twice or have I been the same person in every relationship. NeverlandClub23 , Feb 1, Aug 12, Messages: I would say yes. If possible find out what happened. I can't say more because the person who went thru the nightmare happening to her after she found out from the ex that the same thing happened to her might be joining the boards. But trust me, a leopard doesn't change their spots. GaSleepingBeautyFan , Feb 1, Aug 29, Messages: I was the third wife to my ex-husband. Our marriage lasted 7 years, he was a great guy but not a great husband.
He and his 4th wife have been married 25 years now, have 2 wonderful sons.
Confessions of Women Who've Been Divorced More Than Once
Leopards can change their spots if they really want to. Pakey , Feb 1, No, I would never want to call the exes to see what happened, just like I would never think to call ex girlfriends either. When it is bad? What I have learned to love about myself in the process is my ability to reinvent myself and not compromise.
Many of my friends have been married to the same person to whom they got engaged as embryos, i. I don't feel like a failure. I feel like a success; I lived through tough times left my second husband when our son was 5 -- so it was not easy but have been true to myself. To borrow a line from a song, 'either way it's okay, you wake up with yourself. Would I marry again? At this stage, since my son is grown, I might be in another committed relationship, but I don't need that contract.
Concerns about someone who has been divorcedtwice. | Christian Forums
However, if my significant other insists upon it —- why not? I have learned that I do not suffer fools well. I do not tolerate lies, arrogance, egomaniacs, and those who are prone to laziness. My first husband was far more gregarious than I, and I felt that contributed to our demise. So my second husband was an introvert, and I'm not kidding when I say that I got more emotional support from the wall. I decided there will never be someone who meets my requirements as I have grown old, picky, and impatient.
Statistics show single women live longer, presumably because they spend more time caring for others than themselves, and I am not willing to sacrifice my life span for another who would probably not be willing to do the same for me. My grandmother raised me and she was always single and I believe that contributes to my understanding that one does not need to be in a relationship to be fulfilled. My second divorce was because my husband has his own insecurities which he will NEVER admit, own, or understand.
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I do still believe in marriage because all my siblings have wonderful marriages but I'll never get married again. And, yeah, now I'm a single mom of three kids! I know the first time, we were both so very young, in our teens; that the marriage lasted 15 years was beating the odds. My second time, I was still trying to please my parents, create that family unit that involved family gatherings, outings, just like the Brady Bunch. I was trying to make everyone happy. My three daughters were my first concern so I married someone who seemed to understand that, but really, I needed more attention.
I was aware that he had infidelity issues in his past relationships, which he was honest about with me. My first failed marriage was understandable, we were so young, and then he took a job that kept him from home for two to three weeks at a time. The second time, I felt embarrassed, like a fool, a complete failure. I was so emotionally distraught over this, that I left a secure teaching job, my home, my friends, my children who were then in college, and took a job out of the States.
I felt like there was no hope for me to have any kind of relationship, ever. It took my those three years out of the States, just taking care of me, to feel stronger in my own choices. I sure wish I had done that with this last marriage. Someday I may be bless from God to have a secure and totally commited marriage like the middel one but I will not rush in again.
So, take some advice from someone who has learned the hard way It is God speaking to you to be cautious. I wish you happiness and God's blessings. Mar 2, 9. Move slowly and cautiously if you decide to move forward in this relationship. Please take their advice and lessons to heart, and proceed carefully.
Mar 8, I agree with the others on this matter. Pray about this situation maybe there is a reason why he has been divorced 3 times. Go slowly if it is meant to be, you will know, but don't rush. Yes, pray a lot Our former pastor and his wife The important thing, I think, is to stay malleable to the Lord If He allows a red flag to go up at some point, you want to be able to discern that. Mar 11, The others have given good advice here.
If you were dating someone who has been divorced TWICE....
My dad and one cousin are both twice-divorced. In both cases, former spouses committed adultry. From a woman's point of view, I have only been married once and the divorce was his choice. I was no picnic to live with and he chose alcohol over marriage. I was also fairly young 22 and as far as I'm concerned the victim of the 'Christians must be married by age XX' mentality.
I would tread carefully. It's possible she has some self-esteem issues that causes her to pick men who don't treat her right. I believe that you would be good to her but if she deep-down 'has' to have someone with 'issues' it could be the potential for a stormy relationship. Mar 15, Mar 16, Having been divorced twice myself, I can share that there can be different mistakes in choosing a spouse a second time around, and not all divorces are equal or come about for the same reasons. Neither time I chose a husband was I walking with the Lord.
The two men were very different. I learned a lot from the first marriage and divorce, but that didn't protect me from making other mistakes. My past is my past, and I made the mistakes while backslidden. I am forgiven for both marriages just as I would be for one. You cannot assume that the second marriage failed for the same reasons as the first marriage, therefore you cannot judge them equally, or the unfortunate person who has been through it twice. We hope we get it right, but sometimes things happen beyond our control.
I would suggest getting to really know the person and the reasons for the divorces. Mar 31, Stanfi, you have gotten a lot of good advice from a lot of good people. I, too, have been divorced twice. My first marriage was to my high school sweetheart, but it ended when our son was 4 months old.